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As I learn to embrace the open doors and opportunities in my life, knowing it means closing doors of old behaviors and dishonorable treatment of myself and the God I serve, one prevailing idea keeps circling back.
My fear kept me from my calling, which in turn kept me from my peace.
Embracing my calling to use my voice in the ways God has purposed has meant telling the truth when no one wants to hear it. It has meant being OK with being misunderstood. It has meant being ready to risk everything to be in His will and standing still and steadfast when it looked like everything was exactly what I would lose.
It’s scary even now, as God shows me that He is indeed a promise keeper and a way maker. It’s scary because now that I am certain He will do just what He said, I am in a place of having to ask myself, almost constantly, if I am ready and willing to be responsible with His promises.
That question makes me watch my thoughts, my actions and the life-or-death power of my words. It makes me pray more boldly, cry out with more desperation and study the living text of Scripture with more focus and intention.
These are the ways of someone who has managed to mess up a lot of good things. And knowing that far too many of the enemy’s victories in battle are a direct result of my willingness to walk right into enemy camp and hand over my God-given gifts is humbling. My never-ceasing prayer for God to keep me comes from a deep and broken place.
But from this place that teeters at the border of my old and new seasons, I see that the peace I always wanted was the exact peace I resisted as God called me to it. Coming into that peace required me to take an active part in my relationship with the Lord. It required the acknowledgement that I had been coasting on His grace and mercy when He wanted to give me His best.
Embracing this calling has meant learning new things about myself from the One who created me. It has meant finding out He has surprises and unmerited favor that comes with walking in His purpose. It has meant a deepening of relationships that were once strained and on the verge of disrepair. It has meant pouring out a measure of grace and mercy I never thought I was capable of giving just because the perfect God who created the universe and all it contains continues to do it for me.
Our true calling will always align with the Word of God. Our true calling comes with God’s protection and provision. Our true calling comes with the sweet peace that surpasses understanding.
God is calling us to peace. It’s time to heed the call.
LaMonique Hamilton is a Wilson resident and former Wilson Times reporter and copy editor. She is the national deputy director of communications for Repairers of the Breach and the Poor People’s Campaign: A National Call for Moral Revival and blogs about arts and culture at iamlamonique.com.